Why This Matters
Parents are the most powerful force in a child's life. When they're equipped and empowered, they can change the direction of an entire family, even when things feel completely out of control.
My name is Rob Evans. For 23 years, I worked as a probation officer with families in crisis. Again and again, I saw something powerful: The turning point didn't come from police arrests, court orders or school consequences. It came when a parent stepped up, tired, scared, unsure, and didn't give up. That's why I founded Parenting Solutions. To give parents real tools, real hope, and real change.
I've seen how painful and isolating out-of-control behavior can be. But I've also seen the answer. The answer is parents: parents who felt overwhelmed and defeated, but who found the strength to try something new. And when parents change, kids change. Families heal. Generations shift.
Today's world brings unique challenges. We're raising kids in a culture of constant screens, risky peer pressure, and threats like fentanyl that didn't exist a generation ago. But through it all, one truth remains: Your child needs you. And you are in the best position to lead them.
Still, most parents aren't stuck because they don't care. They're stuck because they feel unsure. Or ashamed. Or afraid that nothing will help. That's what this blog series is about: naming the invisible barriers that hold parents back from taking action. We'll walk through the six most common barriers that keep parents feeling stuck, and offer insight, encouragement, and practical ways to move forward.
Because when you face the barrier, you can change the outcome. And when a parent changes course, the whole family moves with them.
Let's begin.
1. "I Just Don't Know What to Do."
You may feel unsure about what works or worry that your response will backfire. That's totally normal. Parenting doesn't come with a manual, and it's easy to second-guess yourself.
What can help: Learn practical parenting skills, not just theories. Trying to fix a car using metric tools on an American-made car leads to stripped bolts and bent parts. It simply doesn't work. Parenting challenging children and out-of-control behaviors is much the same. These behaviors take the right tools. Learning practical skills designed for these kinds of challenges can move you from feeling immobilized to feeling empowered.
Our Parent Project® Sr. class is packed with practical strategies that help parents feel confident stepping in and addressing unwanted behaviors.
2. "I'm Afraid I'll Make It Worse."
Setting boundaries can feel scary, especially if past attempts have led to blowups, shutdowns, or emotional distance. Many parents worry that stepping in will only escalate things or damage the relationship.
What can help: Sometimes, things do get harder before they get better. When a child's behavior escalates after a parent starts to intervene, it's easy to doubt whether they're doing the right thing. That doubt can lead parents to back off too soon, before real change has a chance to take hold. What's often missing is confidence in the plan and trust in the process.
In our Parent Project® Sr. classes, we teach you how to respond with calm authority, even in the most challenging situations. As skills grow, so does confidence. And with confidence comes lasting transformation.
3. "I'm Burned Out, and I Don't Have the Time or Energy."
When you're running on fumes, it's hard to stay calm, patient, or consistent. The constant stress, lack of sleep, and nonstop responsibilities, whether it's work, household demands, or caring for other kids, can wear down even the most committed parents.
Parenting intentionally takes effort. And when life already feels overwhelming, it can seem impossible to add one more thing, even when you know something needs to change.
What can help: You don't have to do this alone. A community of support can make all the difference. Being surrounded by others who truly understand what you're going through lifts the weight of isolation and renews your motivation. Research shows that when we connect with people facing similar struggles, we feel more hopeful and less alone. As one parent shared: "I feel better because Susie has a worse situation than me." While we all feel for Susie, there's comfort in knowing we're not the only ones in the trenches.
And here's some good news: meaningful change doesn't require doing more. It often means doing less of what's not working. In our experience, most parents are already trying hard and doing many great things, but they're also spending energy on strategies that don't bring peace or create lasting change. When you learn tools that do work, the load gets lighter, not heavier.
We know that committing to a 25-hour parenting program sounds like a lot. But we believe it's one of the best investments you can make for your peace of mind, your child's growth, and your family's future.
When you attend our Parent Project® Sr. program, you'll also gain access to both parent-led and facilitator-led support groups at no additional cost. These aren't add-ons. They're built into the journey, because no parent should have to face these challenges alone.
Give this gift to yourself and your family. You're worth it.
4. "I Feel Guilty or Like I've Already Messed Up"
Many parents walk into our classes carrying a heavy burden:
"I've already messed this up."
"What did I do to cause this behavior?"
If that's you, you're not alone. Guilt, regret, and shame from the past can cloud your ability to take action in the present. But that weight doesn't have to define your future.
We ask every parent in our program a key question: What did you do to create a challenging child?
The answer surprises almost everyone. It's usually far less than they believe about themselves. Yes, parents make mistakes. But healing begins when we own those missteps and move forward, with love, honesty, and a commitment to grow. One mom in our program came in afraid. She had just been released from jail and was terrified her daughter's anger would land her back in trouble. But she didn't give up or let her guilt keep her from intervening in her child's poor behaviors. She showed up. She applied the strategies, built structure, and opened the door to healing, and it changed the dynamic in her home.
Your past doesn't disqualify you. In fact, it may be the very thing that opens the door to a stronger relationship.
What can help: It starts by acknowledging the past, but not camping there. If an apology is needed, offer it with humility, but don't let shame take the lead. Rebuilding happens through consistency. Even if your child doesn't respond at first, keep showing up. They're watching more than they let on.
Use the language of repair. Say things like, "I wish I'd handled that differently. I'm learning." These moments model something powerful: growth. And don't forget to celebrate the small wins. Every time you stay calm under pressure, hold a boundary with love, or lean in instead of walking away, you're laying the foundation for change.
Most importantly, don't do this alone. Guilt grows in isolation, but healing happens in connection. You need a place where you can be honest and supported. That's what we're here for. And if the emotional weight feels too heavy, reach out to a professional. A trusted mental health provider can walk with you through the healing process, helping you process the past and move forward with clarity and strength.
In our Parent Project® Sr. program, one of the most powerful transformations we see is this: parents laying down their shame and stepping into hope.
You haven't missed your chance. Your courage to repair, rather than pretend, is one of the greatest gifts you can give your child. Join us for our Parent Project® Sr. class, and we will let you know what you did to create your challenging child!
5. "I'm Not Sure Anything Will Work."
When you've tried consequences, rewards, therapy, structure, and nothing seems to stick, it's easy to feel hopeless. But change is possible, even if it starts small.
What can help: Begin by choosing one strategy that's designed specifically for challenging behavior, perhaps a tool you learn in Week 1 of our Parent Project® Sr. class, and commit to using it every day. Pay attention not just to isolated moments but to how your child's responses evolve over days and weeks. Give yourself (and your child) grace as you recognize even tiny shifts.
Remember, you don't have to go it alone. Connecting with a support group, coach, or fellow Parent Project® Sr. parents can help you see progress you might otherwise miss, because sometimes emotions blind us to our own wins. Support is critical to your success.
Above all, stay consistent. Steady effort, more than a single dramatic push, is what moves that boulder uphill.
You don't have to believe everything will work, only that something might. One small success can rebuild hope, and once hope returns, everything changes.
6. "It's My Kid That Has the Problem. Why Do I Need to Go to a Stupid Class?"
If you've ever thought, "My kid is the one with the problem. Why am I the one who has to take a stupid class?" you're not alone. When a child's behavior feels out of control, it's easy to focus on fixing them and overlook the powerful role you can play in turning things around.
What can help: While you may not be the source of the problem, you are the most powerful part of the solution. No one else is better positioned to lead change in your home. You can't control your child, but you can influence them, and that influence starts with the right tools, mindset, and support that help you lead with calm authority.
Parenting programs aren't about blaming you. They're about equipping you. Because when you change how you lead, everything else begins to shift.
You're Not Failing. You're Facing Real Barriers.
Being honest about what's hard isn't weakness. It's the first step toward making things better. The more awareness and support you have, the more equipped you'll feel to step into those hard moments with clarity, calm, and connection.
Rob Evans, Founder and Executive Director
